By Gene Galin
Pittsboro, NC – Northwood lacrosse coach Randy Cox has spent much of his life around the sport, from national championship teams at the University of North Carolina to Team USA to the sideline at Northwood High School. Long before Randy Cox became a coach at Northwood, he was part of a generation that helped introduce high-level lacrosse to a wider audience in North Carolina. I had the opportunity to sit down with Randy and his son, Grayson, a Northwood lacrosse player, to talk about the game of lacrosse at Northwood and UNC. [part 1 of a 2-part series]
A lacrosse life that started before the sport was familiar in North Carolina
Cox played at UNC from 1981 through 1984, a stretch that included two NCAA championship teams. Public records from ACC anniversary coverage describe him as a defenseman who played on ACC and NCAA championship teams, earned All-ACC honors in 1983 and 1984, was named ACC Player of the Year in 1984 and was a second-team All-American in 1983. Randy Cox, a Holbrook, N.Y., native and 1984 Carolina graduate, was also selected for induction into the Long Island Metropolitan Lacrosse Foundation Hall of Fame.
In our conversation, Cox recalled arriving in Chapel Hill at a time when lacrosse did not yet occupy the familiar place it now holds in parts of the Triangle. He described the early 1980s Tar Heels as a group that was “really introducing lacrosse to North Carolina,” with the Chapel Hill community gradually embracing the sport as the wins mounted.
“We were undefeated my freshman year. We were undefeated my sophomore year,” Cox said. “Woody Durham and just really the Chapel Hill community took a liking to this new game of lacrosse.”
That detail matters because Cox’s Northwood coaching philosophy is rooted in more than technical instruction. He has seen the game as a player, ambassador, national team member, college program fixture and father. Cox was on the 1986 U.S.A. Lacrosse men’s roster as a defenseman from North Carolina. Currently Cox serves as the official timer for the UNC men’s lacrosse program, a role that keeps him connected to the college game decades after his playing career.
For Grayson, that background has always been close to home.
A son grows up in a sports family
Grayson Cox, a Northwood senior, has not followed his father’s path exactly. He has built his own résumé as a multi-sport athlete, playing quarterback in football and starring in lacrosse. He also played basketball earlier in high school before narrowing his focus to two sports.
“Growing up, we’ve always been a family where we’ve always played sports, no matter what it was,” Grayson said. “It’s always been sports and sports and sports.”
Randy Cox said he has long supported multi-sport participation, and he has found that many college coaches do as well. That view lines up with broader lacrosse development guidance. USA Lacrosse has reported that college coaches often view multi-sport athletes as desirable because they adapt to different coaches, teammates and competitive environments. The organization also cited the benefits of cross-sport skills, movement variety and reduced overuse risk.
For Grayson, the support at home came with freedom.
“If I want to go play football, he’s going to be there for me,” Grayson said of his father. “It’s always going to be my decision on what I want to do with my future.”
That independence is an important part of the father-son dynamic. Randy Cox is both a coach and a parent, both an expert and a supporter. Grayson acknowledged that his father’s lacrosse IQ is difficult to match, but he did not describe a single lesson as the defining piece of advice. Instead, he said the learning has been constant.
“There’s always new advice every day,” Grayson said. “I don’t know if I can sit here and pinpoint one because I’m constantly getting some day in and day out from him.”
Leadership begins with the small jobs
One of the strongest themes throughout our conversation was leadership — not as a slogan, but as a habit.
When asked about the best advice from his mother, Grayson pointed to a principle that has shaped how he sees his role on a team: lead by example. He described a recent practice moment when players were calling for someone else to get water. The lesson from his parents and coaches was simple: do not tell someone else to do a job that you are unwilling to do yourself.
“Don’t tell someone to do something that you’re not willing to do,” Grayson said.
Randy Cox expanded on the idea by connecting it to lessons from his own playing days. He recalled Team USA coach Don Zimmerman emphasizing that every player’s foot had to be behind the line during sprints. It was not merely about the drill. It was about fairness, accountability and not taking shortcuts.
“You don’t need to cheat your teammate,” Cox said, recalling the lesson. “Everyone starts with their foot either on the line or behind the line, and you give 100%.”
That philosophy has carried into his adult life, including his work running companies. Cox said he tries to do the tasks he would ask of others and resists the idea that new players, freshmen or younger team members should automatically inherit the work no one else wants.
“There are some programs out there, not going to name them, but it is where seniors lead by doing the things that you would think would be assigned to a freshman,” Cox said. “That’s intentional.”
For him, those lessons are not extracurricular. They are the point.
“I want these boys, every single one of them, to walk away with something that they can carry on in the next phase of their life,” Cox said.
The compliment that matters most
Grayson said the best compliment he has received from teammates is that they see him as a leader.
That answer did not come across as self-congratulatory. Instead, he framed it as something inherited from older players, coaches and family. He said he had strong leaders ahead of him as a freshman, particularly on the Northwood team that reached the state championship game.
“I’ve always had good leaders in front of me,” Grayson said. “Hearing from my teammates that they see me as a good leader has to be the best compliment that I’ve gotten.”
Leadership in high school sports can be difficult to define because it often reveals itself in brief moments: who picks up equipment, who talks to younger players, who stays after practice, who responds after a loss, who wants the ball in overtime and who still credits others afterward.
In Grayson’s case, those moments have been attached to production. Grayson is a senior midfielder/long-stick midfielder and Northwood’s team leader in goals per game, assists per game, shots on goal, ground balls, goals, assists and points.
But in our conversation, Grayson repeatedly shifted attention away from himself.
“It’s not one v10,” he said. “It’s 10v10, and they’re the reason that I got to where I am today.”
The games that still bring smiles
When asked which games over the past four years brought the biggest smiles, father and son pointed first to the same general chapter: Northwood’s 2023 playoff run and a regional championship win over Orange.
Grayson recalled losing twice to Orange during the regular season, then beating the Panthers on their home field in the East regional championship game to reach the state title game.
“That’s number one by far,” he said.
Randy Cox quickly added another game from that run: Croatan on the road. Northwood trailed 4-1 in the fourth quarter with about nine minutes remaining and rallied to win 5-4.
That comeback remains vivid because of what it required — patience, belief and execution under pressure. It also remains part of a larger relationship between programs. Cox spoke warmly of Croatan coach David Benson and noted that Croatan visited Northwood a few weeks ago for a game and a cookout with families.
“The lacrosse community is one big family,” Cox said.
That family feeling extends beyond high school. Randy Cox said former teammates from the Denver Rifles, a professional team he played for in 1987, were planning a summer reunion. He also mentioned alumni gatherings at UNC, including events tied to national championship teams.
In a sport still growing across many parts of North Carolina, that sense of continuity can be powerful. USA Lacrosse describes high school lacrosse as “a sport on the move,” noting that it has been among the fastest-growing high school sports over the last several decades, even as it remains unevenly distributed nationally. In North Carolina, boys lacrosse participation rose from 3,976 athletes at 118 schools to 4,219 athletes at 121 schools in the 2023-24 school year, according to NCHSAA data.
Northwood’s program is part of that broader growth story.
A senior season marked by records
The most immediate news in our conversation came from Grayson’s senior season.
He said he broke Northwood’s career points record, previously held by Lars Hoeg at 253, during the Croatan game. He then broke the school’s career goals record, previously held by Taylor Leers, against Orange, reaching 161 goals. Against Seaforth, he scored five goals, including the overtime winner.
Grayson explained the distinction between the records clearly for casual fans: a goals record counts goals scored, while a points record combines goals and assists.
That difference matters in lacrosse because it recognizes both finishing and playmaking. A player who scores at a high level can change games. A player who also assists at a high level changes how defenses must play everyone else on the field.
Asked how he reached that point, Grayson did not describe a sudden breakthrough. He described years of accumulation.
As a freshman, he said, older players helped elevate him. During summers, he played club lacrosse with the Red Devils, now Red Devil Sweetlax. He kept playing, kept shooting and kept learning.
He also credited Northwood goalie James Flanagan, who he said has been a major part of his development. Flanagan is Northwood’s senior goalie and the team’s leader in saves and save percentage.
Grayson said he and Flanagan often came out during the summer to shoot.
“Our goalie James Flanagan … we over the summer came out here a lot and just shot and shot and got shots up,” Grayson said.
Having a strong goalie to practice against, he said, sharpened both players. Flanagan knew his moves. He could anticipate tendencies. That made ordinary practice shots more difficult and more useful.
“To have a goalie and to have a Division I goalie that you’re shooting with really, really, really boosts your game,” Grayson said.
One hundred shots a day
For younger players hoping to improve, Grayson’s advice was direct: shoot every day.
He cited Paul Rabil, one of lacrosse’s most prominent modern players, as the source of a simple standard — 100 shots a day.
“Constantly have your stick in your hand,” Grayson said. “Shine, rain, snow, whatever it is, you have to shoot the ball.”
But he was careful to distinguish repetition from mindless repetition. The goal is not merely to fire balls into the middle of the net. Players need to shoot for accuracy, shoot on the move, shoot off dodges and simulate game conditions.
“It’s better to have 20 minutes of hard, solid work than an hour of lackadaisical work,” Grayson said.
That comment may be one of the most practical pieces of advice in the interview. It applies to lacrosse, but also to any sport or skill. Development comes from intentional work, not just time spent nearby.
It also reflects a central theme of the Cox family’s approach: no shortcut replaces disciplined habits.
Coaching for the next phase of life
Randy Cox’s coaching style appears to be shaped by a belief that high school sports are not only about winning games, though winning clearly matters. They are also about preparing young people to operate in teams after sports end.
He described players someday sitting in boardrooms or meetings and drawing from lessons learned on the field. The idea is not sentimental. It is practical. Sports create repeated opportunities to practice responsibility, communication, preparation and resilience.
The North Carolina High School Athletic Association’s 2026 lacrosse calendar shows the structure around which teams are now building toward the postseason: first practice began Feb. 16, first contests began Feb. 25, bracketing is scheduled for May 8, and state championships are set for May 29-30. For seniors such as Grayson Cox and James Flanagan, that calendar represents the final stretch of high school competition.
The stakes can make individual records feel larger. But our conversation suggests that the Coxes see those records as part of a wider team and community story.
Randy Cox smiled when Grayson discussed leadership. Grayson smiled when talking about teammates. Their answers circled back to the same ideas: accountability, effort, family and gratitude.
A father still connected to the game
One of the lighter moments in our conversation involved Randy Cox’s continued work with UNC lacrosse and his recent hip surgery.
He said that four days after surgery, he still made it to a UNC game to work the clock. Someone arranged a ladder. He got to the podium. He did his job.
His wife, according to Randy, was not pleased.
“She was not happy,” Cox said.
The anecdote landed with humor, but it also showed the depth of his commitment to the sport. Cox described opposing coaches checking on him, including Syracuse’s coach noticing him arrive with a walker. That moment, he said, reflected the lacrosse community’s competitive but caring nature.
“Yes, it does get competitive,” Cox said. “We want to win, but there is also a genuine caring for each other.”
For Northwood players, that example is hard to miss. Their coach has not merely studied lacrosse. He has lived inside its networks and traditions for more than four decades.
Northwood’s place in a growing sport
Northwood lacrosse exists at the intersection of local growth and statewide expansion.
The sport has deep roots in certain pockets of the country, but in North Carolina it has expanded over time through college programs, club teams, high school adoption and community coaching. In Chatham County, the sport has become another place where school identity, family investment and local rivalries meet.
The current Northwood schedule and results show the Chargers navigating a competitive spring. Northwood has had recent games against Orange, Carrboro, Seaforth, Croatan, Cedar Ridge and other opponents, including the 10-9 overtime win over Seaforth and a 16-10 win over Cedar Ridge. On Friday evening, Northwood lost to Seaforth 9-5 at home. The conference standings underscore the challenge: Orange, Carrboro, Northwood and Seaforth have all produced competitive results in the 2026 season.
For Grayson Cox, those games are the final tests of a high school career built through repetition. For Randy Cox, they are the latest chapter in a lacrosse life that began in a very different era of the sport’s North Carolina story.
Records fade, lessons travel
My conversation with Randy and Grayson Cox was framed around lacrosse, but its most lasting message was about inheritance — not simply the inheritance of athletic talent, but of standards.
Randy Cox brought to Northwood a lacrosse background few high school coaches can match: UNC national championship experience, ACC honors, Team USA, professional lacrosse and decades of connection to the Carolina program. Grayson Cox has taken that environment and built his own career, becoming a senior leader, multi-sport athlete and school-record holder.
Yet the most repeated lessons were not about highlight plays. They were about keeping a foot behind the line, getting water without being asked, taking 100 purposeful shots, crediting teammates and doing work that younger players can see.
For parents and young athletes, the takeaway is straightforward: development is rarely one dramatic moment. It is a long pattern of habits, support, coaching, competition and accountability.
Watch on YouTube – Northwood lacrosse coach Randy Cox & son Grayson (part 1) – 4.23.26
Northwood Lacrosse Coach Randy Cox Reflects on His Athletic Journey and Dual-Sport Benefits with Son Grayson
00:16 Coach Randy Cox shares his lacrosse journey and impact in North Carolina.
- Randy Cox played lacrosse at UNC in the early 80s, participating in two national championship teams.
- He helped popularize lacrosse in North Carolina, gaining community support and media attention during its early days.
02:57 Randy Cox emphasizes the benefits of dual sport participation for athletes.
- College coaches support dual sport athletes as it promotes teamwork and diverse skills.
- Grayson shares his family’s strong sports background and his father’s unwavering support in his athletic endeavors.
05:17 Lead by example and cultivate teamwork in lacrosse.
- The importance of not asking others to do tasks you wouldn’t do yourself is emphasized.
- Valuable lessons from previous coaches highlight commitment and fairness in team dynamics.
07:53 Reflection on leadership and memorable lacrosse game victories.
- The speaker emphasizes the importance of leadership and the impact of learned experiences on future success.
- Two memorable lacrosse games include the comeback victory against Croatan and the playoff win against Orange, highlighting the team’s resilience.
10:38 The lacrosse community remains connected through reunions and support.
- Reunions for past teams, like the Denver Rifles and UNC, highlight the close-knit nature of the lacrosse community.
- Randy Cox shares his ongoing involvement with the UNC program and the support he received post-surgery.
13:21 Randy Cox discusses family bonds and Grayson breaking lacrosse records.
- The competitive nature of sports is balanced with genuine care among players and families.
- Grayson broke multiple lacrosse records, including career points and goals during recent games.
15:50 Grayson discusses his journey to breaking school lacrosse records.
- He credits his success to the support from teammates and dedicated coaching, emphasizing teamwork.
- Grayson highlights the importance of consistent practice and playing opportunities to elevate skills.
18:01 Practicing 100 shots daily enhances lacrosse skills significantly.
- Consistency is key; training in all weather conditions builds discipline and improves accuracy.
- Working with a skilled goalie elevates practice effectiveness, boosting understanding and game IQ.